from a happy place

well, I am writing tonight from one of my happy places--the Kitterman home--where I am pulling an overnighter. Kids are asleep (FINALLY. it took no less than 8 picture books), cats are asleep-ish, the place is cleaned up. and it's just me and my jammies playing like I own the place. I've been thinking a lot about families lately. What makes them so great and what I would have to do to make mine even greater. blame it on all these family-themed movies that have been coming out: the Family Stone, Dan in Real Life, Little Miss Sunshine, Meet the Robinsons (just watched that one tonite with the kiddies, actually). The Grapes of Wrath, which did not just come out, but which I am still reading.
Our families are these mini-worlds. we make laws and patterns that don't necessarily reflect reality. I think of the world my mother created when I was little--where saying "shut-up" was next to murder & where there was some kind of second-wave depression going on so we had to wear our clothes until they wore out (regardless of fit or fashion) and use spatulas to eek out the last scrapings of peanut butter in the jar.
(sidenote: I still fight a wave of guilt any time I throw away a ziplock bag instead of cleaning it up and reusing it)
In my mom's world it wasn't weak or naive to be tenderhearted (which all of my siblings are)--something she taught us crying over stories she read to us from the Friend, and at the deaths of our pets.
I don't mean to disturb anyone, but I think families are more than that traditional kind. I think they are wherever we are at and with whomever we choose to be with. it just takes two people choosing to believe in the same thing--two people willing to play the game. I don't know, maybe for some people it only takes one. or one and some cats or something.
In my family I want a place that is open. sharing (most people who know me well know my sense of possession is kind of...blurry). A place with lots of food and people and music. I don't want anyone ever to be shushed. I want a little love-shack. like dancing with the girls earlier, until we were worn out and huffing on the floor. like people who aren't too scared to admit they need eachother
I know that kind of family requires those same things out of me. you know, I have to be the amerigo vespucci of that world. that new world. but I am willing to work on that
anyways, those are my thoughts tonite from my happy place. I love my family. let's face it, you don't make it that hard ;)
sweet dreams.
erin